Familiar Rooms in Darkness by Caro Fraser

Author:Caro Fraser
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Penguin Books Ltd
Published: 2003-09-15T00:00:00+00:00

10

Joyce Barrow’s home in New Cross was a fifth-floor flat on a run-down council estate. Bella, rather than take the rancid-smelling lift, trudged up the dank stairwell to a walkway of front doors, overlooking a green where washing hung in rows.

She knocked, and a few moments later a small, elderly woman in carpet slippers came to the door. Like her sister, Joyce Barrow had a sweet, delicate face, but her white hair was cut short, unpermed. My aunt, thought Bella. They smiled uncertainly, searchingly at one another. Bella put out a tentative hand and Joyce Barrow shook it.

‘Come in,’ she said, padding down the hallway ahead of Bella and into a small, stuffy sitting room, its windows closed despite the heat of the day. An old, very thin man sat in a large armchair in one corner of the room, opposite the television, a copy of the Daily Mirror on his lap. He had about him an air of distinct permanence, as though he did not move much from that spot.

‘This is my husband, Arthur,’ said Joyce. ‘I won’t introduce you, because he’s very deaf. He knows who you are, though.’

Bella nodded and smiled at Arthur, who nodded back and scrutinized her carefully, before turning his attention back to the newspaper once again.

‘Sit down, do.’

Bella sat at one end of the small sofa, and Joyce Barrow sat at the other, hands folded in her lap, inspecting Bella. Bella allowed herself to be looked at. Joyce Barrow shook her head, and Bella saw tears spring into her eyes. ‘This is such a lovely surprise. I never thought it would happen. Can I give you a hug, dear?’

Bella and Joyce Barrow embraced briefly, awkwardly. The old lady smelled faintly of onions and furniture polish.

‘This is all very strange for me,’ said Bella. ‘I only found out recently that I was adopted. That my brother and I were. You said in your letter that Derek was a little shocked when I showed up on his doorstep, and I am sorry about that. I was rather working in the dark, you see, and I had no idea who knew…’

‘Don’t worry.’ Joyce Barrow put out a hand and patted Bella’s. She made the gesture hesitantly, feeling somewhat awed by this very beautiful young woman, by the way she spoke and looked. She could see some resemblance to Doreen, even to their own mother, who’d been something of a beauty, but she felt no instant affiliation, no sense that this girl was part of their family. She seemed too remote, almost too exotic, to be connected to their life and world. But she had to be. There could be no doubt, from all that Derek had told her, that this was Doreen’s daughter.

There was an awkward pause, and Bella said, ‘If you could tell me more about what happened when I was born, I’d be very grateful. I still don’t know much beyond what my mother – my adoptive mother – told me. I mean, I

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